Do you know where I was when the Wal-Mart opened at 5 a.m. this morning for the early shoppers?
I was sound asleep is where I was. And I was sawing logs at 4 a.m. when the other stores opened to cater to the, well, lunatics who get up that early to go shopping.
Shopping.
Shopping is what you do an inch ahead of starving, when the bell bottoms finally fray apart, when there is simply nothing else to do at all. But to get up before the roosters to go shopping?? This is not what healthy people do.
Shopping before sunrise? I don’t think so. Once, only on assignment, I visited the stores in the pre-holiday wee hours to see exactly what motivated people to get up and out before the sun. Mostly they were there because they were nuts. There was nothing at 5 a.m. that wouldn’t be available at 11 a.m. but they were caught up in the frenzy of other bent noodles who had left the warm beds for the cold aisles. Amazing.
Unless you are buying something for me-me-me there is no need whatever to get up so astoishingly early to commit an act of shopping.
Go back to bed, people.
